Attorney Alan Dershowitz: a man up for sale

Dear Mr. Dershowitz.

I have followed your illustrious career from the time when you and your legal associates used to take cases of constitutional importance.  I don’t think many people follow your career back that far. But that was the first sign of you being an egotistical, arrogant, celebrity- seeking, selfish person.  I remember how you chose the name of the principal attorney handing the appeal or motion.  When the case was in doubt, you put the name of one of your associates on the papers to be filed.  If the case was a “sure thing” you put your name down as the principal attorney.  A very wise career moved, even if it was slimy and disgusting, and unfair to your law associates.  Just so you could brag about “never losing a case.”


Now, let’s move on to the O.J. Simpson case.  You knew the man was guilty beyond the shadow of a doubt.  Of course what most people don’t know is that O.J. didn’t just kill Ron Goldman and his wife, he almost decapitated them.  Of course that didn’t stop you from attempting to put a murderer back on the street.  I know it wasn’t just money that led you to the case, it was the notoriety.  You are a media-craving, attention-seeker who craves notoriety as much as Dracula craves blood.  Media recognition is your blood.  And to get your fix, it doesn’t matter how guilty the client, how heinous the crimes, or how great a chance there is of the monster striking again.


Claus Von Bulow, Jeffrey Epstein, Donald Trump, O.J. Simpson. Tell me, who would you not represent if it meant getting your face on camera?

Claus Von Bulow.  Now there’s a sociopathic individual if there ever was one.  I tip my hat to you for rescuing him from the gallows.

Jeffry Epstein, another client you felt compelled to represent because “Everyone, even the most heinous person deserves legal representation.”  Isn’t that the famous rationalization for representing the scum of the earth?  Of course you could have said you cannot represent the man because, “I know beyond the shadow of a doubt he is guilty and a danger to society,” but then you would have lost hours of face time on the major networks.  And that would have been worse than not getting paid by a client.

Wouldn’t it have been poetic justice if, after helping Epstein get off the first time, he went out and turned your granddaughter into a slave, whore who took it up the ass from anyone with enough money to pay the going rate?

I took a poll, and the overwhelming response was that you would still have represented Epstein the second time even of it had committed atrocities against your family members.


Well, then you had been out of the news for a decade and you needed your fix, so you offered to represent Donald Trump.  I’m sure you know that the charges against Trump are trivial compared to what he’s done to the country.


  • violation of the emoluments act
  • Stole money donated to the Presidential inaugural Ceremony and used it for personal reasons.
  • Made all government workers stay at his hotel properties all over the world when they traveled on government business.
  • Stole money from his own charity. Going so low as to write a check for $7 to cover the cost of his son’s initiation fee into the boy scouts.
  • Transferring 1 million acres of National parks over to the gas and oil companies to rape the land. Partly because he hates non-white people and this was a way of sticking it to the Native American Indians.
  • Opting out of the clean air and clear water act, placing the entire population at the mercy of the polluting companies, spewing their poisons in the rivers, streams, lakes and air.
  • Gutting the budget of the EPA so companies could pollute without recompense.
  • Gutting the budget of the FDA so the drug companies can kill another 300,000 people a year.
  • Laundering billions of the Russian Mafia – through Richard Slater – billions stolen from the Russia people who live in third world conditions.
  • Opting out of the Paris Climate accord when every country in the world signed on.
  • Opting out of te Iranian nuclear deal because the military always needs a new enemy.

Say; let talk about Israel.  You’re a practicing Jew.  You love Mike Pompeo’s Middle East Policy.  Well, let’s examine that policy.

  • Moved the American embassy to Palestine, infuriating the Palestinians, leading to many deaths, making the path to a two state solution even more impossible.
  • Supporting Israel in building new settlements in the disputed areas, violating the U.N. resolution.
  • Killing the second most important man in Iran, a man who was considered a God by the Iranians.
  • So, what could possible happen after all those ridiculous, dangerous, ill-conceived moves and policies?
  • Well, for one, Russia is arming Syria and Iran with the most modern offensive and defensive weapons. Two countries which happen to be Israel’s most dangerous neighbors.  Iran is then modernizing and supporting Hamas and Hezbollah, mortal enemies now working together to destroy Israel.  By supporting Pompeo you are supporting policy that will lead to the destruction of Israel.

I think we both agree that Hilary Clinton is a sociopath.  While a private attorney in Arkansas, she represented a man who had killed 5 people, held them in pens, raped the women then chopped them up and put them through a mucher.

Miraculously, Hilary got him off on a technicality.  She bragged about that victory to anyone who would listen.  Other people, even attorneys, would have some reservations and be unable to fully rationalize their actions.

The reason I bring this up is because you did the exact same thing with your nefarious, evil, degenerate, murderous clients.  Ergo, you too are a sociopath.

I don’t think there was ever a camera you did not like.  You would represent the devil himself if it led to your face plastered on the evening news.

You are a hypocrite who rationalizes away Trump’s horrific human rights record.  (Did you know that hate crimes went up over 1,000% during Trump’s term?  Do you know anything?  They have smart algorithms that know the law as good as you.  But what they don’t do is rationalize which dangerous, psychotic people to represent.  They’ll leave that to you.  Those machines have more compassion than you.

You support a president who has destroyed the country.  Impeaching Trump for withholding military aid is like charging him for stealing a piece of gum from a variety store, when, in fact, he burning down the store and killing the owner.

So, you like Trump’s and Pompeo’s Middle East Policy?  You are a fool.

Trump / Pompeo policy will guarantee more and more sophisticated, deadly attacks against Israel.

The Trump / Pompeo plan is not a peace plan.  It never was.  It is a war plan.  It was meant to infuriate, disrespect, and denigrate the Arabs so that they would not agree to it.  Then Trump and Pompeo and the rest of the obese scum in the administration could say, “Hey, we tried.  It was them who turned it down.”

The plan was an insult, a slap in the face to the Palestinian people.

Did you know that the Israeli military policy has always had a policy of 100 to 1?  (A better question is do you know anything?).  Back to 100-1.  Ever since the Haganah, Irgun and The Stern Gang at Israel’s inception, the policy of the Israeli military was 100-.   They believed that because they were surrounded by 292 million Arabs to 6 million Jews and a total Arab GDP of $1.1 trillion compared with $110 billion for Israel –the Israeli military would have to kill 100 Arabs for every Jew killed in order to justify the loss of their precious few citizens.

Do you even care if Israel is considered an Apartit state by 90% of the world’s nations?

Tell me, do you think one Jew is worth 100 Arabs?  Of course you do, because you are a practicing Jew who has no conception of the long term consequences of such a policy.

At some point in the near future, sanctions will be lifted on Iran.  They will keep their promise to not build a nuclear weapon, but they will use all the modern arms bought from Russia to arm Hamas and Hezbollah to further their agenda in the Middle East. And take revenge for Qassem Soleimani.  Their memory is long and Solenami will not be forgotten.  The price Israel pays for not giving up a few miles of desert, and leaving the embassy in Palestine, will come back to haunt Israel.

Do you know why Trump moved the Embassy?  Not because he loves Jews.  He once said, “I’d never let them count my money.”  It was because Sheldon Adelson gave him $100 million dollars.  How do I know?  I went to the University of Peen, studying International Affairs.  Many of the people I went to school with have held major positions in administrations ever since Carter.

 Each intifada will take a greater toll against Israel.  That is the future you condemn Israel to for supporting Trump and Pompeo’s policy.  Hey, did you know that Pompeo was voted the most unethical, most immoral cadet in his whole class at West Point?  Do you know that the only thing Pompeo has even been successful at is putting Buffets out of business?

Do you know Trump has opted out of all those treaty?  NOT BECAUSE they were bad treaties, but because they did not have his name on them?

Trump is a subhuman who slithered out of the deepest sewer and onto land with the mission to make over the country so it looked and acted like himself.  Did you know that’s the definition of the Marburg virus?…a virus that enters the body and turns the body’s organs into itself.

Trump is beyond greedy, stupid and arrogant.  He is insane based on the analysis of his behaviors and statements by some of the best physiatrists and psychologists in the country.  And you, by your defense of him before the Senate, prove yourself to be above the constitution like he has claimed.

Hey, that flip-flop from “No president is above the law” to “Trump, as president, is above the law” was a thing of beauty.

Here are the actual quotes (in case you were able to rationalize it away in your twisted mind….

Dershowitz acknowledged his changing position on whether a president can be impeached for “criminal-like conduct.”

Dershowitz argued in 1998 during the Clinton impeachment that a president doesn’t have to commit a “technical crime,” such as abuse of power, in order for it rise to an impeachable offense. However, he has said in Trump’s defense that the framers intended for impeachable conduct to mean “criminal-like conduct.”

He said in 1998: “It certainly doesn’t have to be a crime. If you have somebody who completely corrupts the office of president and who abuses trust and who poses great danger to our liberty, you don’t need a technical crime.”

You were correct in assuming that the average citizen never watches the unadulterated news and have short memories.  For the rest of us, you did provide a wonderful moment of hilarity.

Trump has done irreparable harm to the country that will take decade’s to correct.  But much longer due to your ass-kissing, boot-licking of a man who has personally tried to destroy democracy, subvert the constitution, end free trade and make a farce of rule of law.

And patting the back of Mike Pompeo made me throw up.  You saying it was to congratulate him on his wonderful Middle East Policy when every fucking human being on the plant knew you were referring to his degrading a reporter.

Really enjoyed the interview you had with Mr. Tobin.  I thought Mitt Romney was the biggest flip-flopper in government (according to Congressman Barney Frank, one of the most respected congressmen of all times.

Say, why don’t you review his record and see how you stand up against him?  I think you should have a razor blade nearby.

Does it matter at all to you that your clients are and have been the most evil, most depraved, most dangerous men in modern history?

Oh, so you say every defendant needs the best lawyer he can get.  I thought that was the rationalization made by lawyers just starting out who need every client to pay off school loans, not by lawyers who have made enough money to live well.  That is when good lawyers, good men, compassionate men, use the bully pulpit to promote not just legality, but morality.

The best possible outcome for the country would be for you to have a stroke and not be able to speak anymore.  Of course, little would be lost because every word out of your mouth is a rationalization and a justification, a twisting and contorting of the law that strangles American citizens’ faith in honesty, integrity and the law.

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